I expected that this would be the blog post that I would write when my eldest turned 13 or 14. And perhaps it still will be. My suspicion is that the intensity will increase with each teen year that passes. But I find myself, on the eve of my daughter’s 12th birthday, reflecting on the struggle of adolescence: the desire for independence while still being emotionally dependent. Turning 12 is a delightful, challenging, maturing, joyful, stretching time. In a word, growth. 12 is growth. No longer a small child but not an adult. Capable of deep thoughts, deep emotions, deep struggles, while trying to find her place. Wanting to be responsible while not really wanting responsibility, or discovering that she is not ready for the responsibility that she seeks. Leaping five steps ahead only to have to turn back and retrace her steps to find surer footing. When she begins to learn that her walk with the Lord is hers to walk alone. Repentance and forgiveness. Repentance and forgiveness. Learning that life is repentance and forgiveness on repeat, over and over, toward God, toward those we love, and others toward her. Learning that relationships struggle if we don’t nurture them, and how sometimes, how we speak to one another means more than the words said. Beginning to learn the lesson that His mercy is new every morning and with repentance comes new life. Discovering that she is capable of more than she realizes and not to give up, even when she feels like a failure. Learning that mistakes are how we grow, and to embrace hard things because they will help shape her to be the woman she desires to be. She loves more deeply than we can see and hurts more deeply than we even realize. I have learned that a smile and a hug every morning begins the day with sunshine instead of rain. Turning 12 is exciting and beautiful and hard. And I’m only watching. Imagine what it is for she who is actually going through it; this girl who still likes girly things but has a mind that thinks far into the future. Oh that time would slow down and that 12-year-olds would stop and savor their youth while they have it. But they don’t, because they lack wisdom. That is their plight. Our duty is to lead them to seek wisdom during their years of growth by seeking the wisdom giver, the author of truth.
“The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom.”